A Blog Mainly About Food

If by "mainly" you mean "sometimes"

Friday, June 24, 2005

The Massive Grocery Store Conspiracy

A busy day yesterday... thus I only got to read one of the out of control comment streams on DCist today. I speak of this thread about the new Columbia Heights (or "Tivoli," what I hear those evil gentrifiers are calling it) Giant, which among other things has apparently taken public space for a pick up/drop off point. I haven't seen it myself, so I can't comment on that. However, there's also a thread (dropped midconversation) in there about how, apparently, loyalty cards hurt the poor. No wait, loyalty cards are an invasion of privacy. No wait, stores are planning on rewarding customers that spend more money by giving them discounts. Clearly, this Michael fellow has uncovered the massive supermarket owner cabal that threatens to make the rich richer and the poor poorer.

The Columbia Heights Giant is just the beginning people. Wait until Target comes, and starts rewarding customers based on whether or not they purchase the $2 or $4 toilet paper. And by reward I mean giving them points on their Target Visa, redeemable after they spend $1000 for a 10% discount. The rich will acheive that ten times faster than the poor and the results will be catastrophic. Pretty soon, the wretched of the Kenyon Road earth will be forced out by such unfair practices, forced to live off grubs and 7-11 taquitos.

Unrelated: I figured out what they did with the Bat-nipples from the first four Batman movies -- they gave them to Katie Holmes for her last few minutes as Rachel Dawes in Batman Begins! Guess Chris Nolan had to get some nipplage in the films. Decent movie, but I walked out disappointed.